There is always a beginning

While this is my first Tumblr blog posting (is that the correct nomenclature?  I’m a newbie), it is not my first mental posting about all topics related to music, film and teaching piano. I often find many parallels to learning an instrument with other more lofty issues in life.  

One in particular is an issue many people struggle with, that of self-doubt when facing a new task.  Here’s my example:  

I’ve been playing piano since I was 5.  Er, I should re-phrase that.  I’ve been playing, writing music, teaching and studying music, since I was 5 years old.  I started playing piano when I was a little kid, and while my recollection of all things in my childhood is mediocre, I do remember that I was good at piano.  Like, child prodigy good. I can say that now and not sound like a snob because that’s just what I was told my whole life when it came to the piano.  Nowadays I write music professionally and teach some piano lessons.  And I don’t sit down at my piano and practice for an hour a day, because now as an adult, I am solely responsible for creating the incentive to do so, no longer practicing just out of fear that I will disappoint my parents or my teacher.  I have certainly lost a good amount of technique over the years from not keeping up that level of practicing, and not having a teacher leaves me somewhat on my own.  

Now, back up a couple months.  I heard a woman perform Chopin’s Fantaisie Impromptu at a recital I was lending a hand at.  And holy batman, she was a phenomenal player.  And that is a phenomenally difficult piece to play.  At least it seems like its difficult.  (Ok, I’m not going to lie, it really is that difficult).  So, I went home, printed out the music and decided that I too could play that piece, even though my days of daily practicing have become a distant memory from college.  

My approach:  I went through the right hand very slowly, paying attention to the fingering.  And I mean slow like a sloth.  I must have done this for days, and I would go a measure at a time, sometimes a half a measure.  After a while, I got the guts to bring it up to tempo.  And after forcing my fingers to do what my brain was telling them to do, magically they finally started playing it up to tempo.  Even if it was only for two measures, and even if there were a few mistakes, that was still a big accomplishment.  After some more days (ok, I’ll be honest, weeks) I decided to add the left hand and try to bring small sections up to tempo.  And when it started happening it was like magic.  (Did I already mention the magic part? Yes…..).  I really couldn’t believe I was playing the section of the piece the way I was.  And so it goes, little by little, I’m getting through small sections of the piece.  

What did I glean from this experience?  Well, having foolish faith in one’s abilities is actually a blessing and can amount to tackling tasks that would otherwise seem out of reach.  So, I’m using this as an example when I’m faced with another task that seems too difficult and unpleasant….I’m just going to start small and ignore the little voice in my head that says I can’t do it.